Down with upbeat OGMs

Today I called Zogger but her wasn't there. As I headed into the traffic jam his dulcet tones struck a chord.

"Hello you have reached 'Zogger' if you'd like to leave a message, please do so after the beep."

But I hadn't reached him. He wasn't there and I was listening to a recording.

I thought about my own (famous amongst my British friends) OGM.

"Hi this *is* Rod Crawford. I am either out of the office or away from my desk. Please leave a message at the tone."

That seemed to be a lie too. The recorded message was not me it was a recorded message.

Thinking about Andy and Sarah's message from a while back it announced itself as "Answering Machine and then gave it's instructions, which to me (in the traffic jam by this point) seemed better.

 

So I am now thinking about a more realistic OGM that reflects the failure of the caller to achieve their goal. Perhaps they failed due to ignorance (they called me when I was asleep). Perhaps they failed due to something unforeseen that they couldn't have known about (like a meeting). Perhaps they failed because I just didn't want to talk to them.

Nonetheless, they failed and I think the OGM should reflect that.

 

So how about:

 

"Hello you have failed to reach Rod Crawford. You can try again or leave a message on this machine which he may hear."

 

Or:

 

"Hello this message reflects your failure to reach Rod Crawford. You might be more successful next time, or you can leave a message on this machine."

 

The Nutter in the Coffee Shop

There are nutters everywhere. Most people never notice them because they never bother them.

However, some of us find that they exert some kind of natural magnetism that attracts them to come over and ruin our day.

 

Yesterday, I was working in Kinko's copy shop and in came a nutter. I could tell he was a nutter right away- He was 7 feet tall with a long beard brandishing half a dozen carrier bags of "stuff". "Wow look at all these computer types. Cool." he proclaimed to anyone who would listen. No one wanted to listen. It was as if each person exuded and negative energy field, attempting to repel the nutter. All except me since I was on the phone at the time.

He sat down beside me and talked loudly about how he had saved the lady over there 6 cents a copy, completely ignoring that fact that I was talking to my manager at the time.

 

Luckily this nutter had a weak bladder and the minute he headed for the toilet I grabbed my laptop and did a runner.

 

This morning I am sitting in Starbucks for a cup of coffee and some time to clear down my email while the traffic cleared down around me. 10 minutes after sitting down, up pops the same nutter and sits down beside me. "Wow you've got the same laptop as me. What's going on with the weather? I've hardly slept for days....."

Sigh!

 

Luckily he has gone to the toilet again, so I'll finish this email and do a runner.

Turning 5

Alexander's birthday was indeed a spectacular event. Along with the obligatory bouncy castle he also received a visit from the Lizard Lady and her pets. This seemed to be a big hit with almost all of the children and I think the adults enjoyed it too.

Missing the Train

About a year ago when I realized that our office was going to be moving to Sunnyvale I spent some time researching alternative means of transport in order to reduce my likelihood of either arriving at home/work in a blind rage or not actually arriving at home/work.

Luckily the Valley Transport Authority (VTA) had the answer a new Light Rail service from Campbell (next town to Los Gatos) into San Jose and then out passing within 100 yards of the office. I was delighted! It was due to open on August 12th and I felt bad that I wasn't there to cheer on the Major and other dignitaries in their cutting of ribbons and the like. However, when I got back from vacation and drove to the park-and-ride station I noticed it was pretty much empty.

"It's not working!" one VTA employee on a break (probably a very long one if it wasn't working) told me. I asked why, and was told that because it used Union Pacific Railroad Track, it either had to conform to their regulations or VTA had to apply for waivers to allow it to flaunt these regulations- They applied too late and the line was closed until "Fall". Latest info says October, but when in October is another question.

However, that didn't stop the VTA from laying on it's "Los Community Shuttle" bus from Los Gatos to the VTA Light Rail in Campbell and back right on schedule (as in- since August) .

Round and round it goes every 30 minutes, taking imaginary people from Los Gatos to the Light Rail station and back- the buses' logo proclaiming that VTA is there to protect the environment. I expect they (the VTA) will shut it down some time in October because nobody used it to get to or from the Light Rail Station!

The Last Day

Is it really the last day before we head back tomorrow? It seems so short! Well, there is certainly more we can do here, but that is for another time.
I drop Dena and her bike off at Lake Tahoe and let her wend her way back down the 8 miles of newly installed bike trail that crisscrosses the river. No sooner does she arrive back near the house than Alexander wants to set out for Squaw Valley and off they go. Thinking I can sneak in another quick trip to the “Dubliner” while they ride, I pack the car with all we need for the day and head off, only to be surprised to find them already at Squaw when I arrive. Wow- he does uphill too.

IMHO America does daft things really well! From Squaw Valley we take the cable car up to the top of the mountain range 8200ft. At the top there is a restaurant, an ice skating rink, a very large swimming pool and an outdoor spa! After lunch there is nothing else for it, but to don our swimming gear and head for the pool and spa!Tired by altitude but not exhausted we head back down to Squaw Valley and Alexander out does himself by cycling back with to the house with me.

The Fantasy Lunch

I have probably already told you what I finally missed about the UK. Well, today I got to do it! I rode my bike up to Squaw Valley, went to the Irish Pub and sat outside supping a pint while reading a music mag I had brought with me- Alone! It was utterly civilized. Dena and Alexander turned up just as I was mellowing out. We had a nice lunch and the Alexander and I rode back (a gentle downhill) to the house.

Late afternoon, Alexander had puppy love with Bonnies new dog Missie and then Bonnie, August and the dogs headed back to Auburn leaving me to set fire to the chicken on the gas BBQ (out of practice).

The House on the Truckee River

This house was built by some of Dena's ancestry and snuggles in between the mountains and the river at about 600ft. August has done wonders to modernize it and has added some really cool things like a hot tub and modern kitchen. The picture shows the view from the side of the house looking up river. The view from our bedroom was similar.

The Sierras

School being somewhat different from my day, no sooner had Alexander started than we were told the school would be closed for Teacher Training the day after Labor Day. This provided us with and excellent opportunity to have 4 day weekend, so we headed up to the Sierras to stay in Dena’s Aunt Bonnie’s house by the Truckee River.

As some of you may know Aunt Bonnie has recently retired from being the highest ranking female office in the American Navy and has taken up Alpaca ranching in Auburn. En-route to Truckee we stopped off and visited Bonnie and August’s ranch where they have 22 Alpaca’s. Needless to say Alexander took to feeding them straight away.